When the radio announcer announced an “appreciation lap,” England’s players found themselves applauding a vast expanse of empty red plastic seats with a level of excitement that seemed mockingly mocking. One of the biggest concerns in championship football is peaking too early for the better teams. In this respect at least, England look safe.
Instead, they took the nuclear option, the ultimate counterattack, and lost 0-1 to Iceland, currently ranked 72nd in the world, and were booed by schoolchildren. Not just losing, but losing miserably, like a team suffering an excruciating migraine.
A certain level of listlessness is understandable. It’s not launch day yet. England will fly to Leipzig on Monday. Currently, the team members are in the pre-departure stage, spitting out airsickness pills, chewing the last piece of military sawdust chocolate, and anxiously clutching their parachute bags. No one wants to get hurt right now. The match did feel unnecessary, coming a week after a Big Brother-style elimination round that was thrown into disarray.
The problem for Southgate is that there are still some kinks to work out. Southgate has essentially dismantled this squad over the past few months and implanted something new, believing he can work some kind of alchemy on the parts and send lightning through the thing .
But there’s basically nothing here, no pulse, no tension, no sense of system, no array of weapons at work. Passes and combinations were missed or never attempted. For those who didn’t attend, it was at least a good game. Conor Gallagher has never looked so attractive, a nasty, energetic, snarky presence.
So we keep going. Predicting success in any tournament is a fool’s errand. England looks forward to it. England’s expectations are often wrong. But England will still be looking forward to it. What’s interesting this time around is that, in theory, this team does have a chance of winning these European Cups. But they also have flaws. The ceiling is very high. There are holes in the ceiling too.
Huge cuts and changes were made to address issues at left-back, midfield and centre-back. Southgate’s problem in this defeat is that we know nothing about these characters. In other words, everything learned is bad.
Those areas of interest are filled by left-back Kieran Trippier, who will start at the Euros and is a warrior and intelligent defender but has struggled in a team in need of width.
At centre-back, Mark Gay must now be considered the starting halfback alongside John Stones. He has good ball control. His aggressiveness in the air is not obvious. Iceland crawled over him a little. Without at least one dominant force present, it’s hard not to see trouble ahead.
Then, finally, we come to midfield, the linchpin of any Championship team, which felt empty at the start of the day and remained so at the end. Kobbie Mainoo’s selection shows he’s in the catbird seat. Mainoo is an outstanding young player. But Declan Rice’s double pivot doesn’t work here. Rice had to sit still for a while longer. His wave was missed. And the space is too big. The midfield is so friendly. Mainu is an artist. England needs someone dirtier and more madly committed to filling the void.
Newsletter Promotion Post
The worst part is scoring goals. Iceland eased through England’s midfield without resistance and Jon Dagur Thorstensson turned onto the lime green Wembley lawn, Mainu counterattacked and Stones waited too long to mount a challenge. The shot was low and hard and into the corner. But it was all so lifeless, no energy, no resistance, nothing that made a team.
This will give Southgate power. This is what he fears, what he sweats over. Be open, vulnerable and vulnerable. In the past, opponents have commented on the sheer muscle of Southgate’s best teams, and the feeling of running into a wall of cement bags. This is a physically weak England.
As for the cover presence around Rice, it doesn’t really solve any problems. Role 4 (old-fashioned notation) is very complex. The angles are custom and unusual. Coverage radar, a keen sense of where and how are critical.
In the absence of specialists, England will now surely inject more energy into the area, with Gallagher’s endlessly roaring engine and Jude Bellingham replacing Phil Foden in the No. The performance here is as wiped from history as possible and as pixelated as possible from any surviving tapes.
Things were even worse in the second half, with England’s seams too loose and the spaces too wide. Sometimes a team, especially a friendly, polite team like this, needs to feel a little angry. Reviewing the video of this failure should do the trick.
So, on to Blankenhayn. England are still looking forward to it. England always look forward to it. At least, it can look forward to something more than that.
