timeHey, there’s a German word for it: Briefcase Trainer Paradigma phrase used to describe a person who is clearly brilliant at what they do, but is still widely regarded as a disaster.
Well, actually there is no such thing single word single word. The phrase “There’s a German word for it” itself is a long-standing red flag, what Germans call a “danger flag”. Introduction to long words in fake German. But as Gareth Southgate prepares his side to take on Switzerland in Dusseldorf on Saturday night, the concept of how to accurately define or measure success feels very much in the air.
This will be a fourth consecutive quarter-final appearance for a manager who is now always one game away from a possible finish line and who is also approaching the ultimate expression of his own unique drive – us It could be called Southgate’s paradox.
The incident was brought to the forefront during last weekend’s chaotic win over Slovakia in Gelsenkirchen. But many people will find this fact very annoying, even impossible, but it is still true. Whatever happens against Switzerland, Southgate is England’s most successful manager in history. Arguably Southgate is the greatest in terms of results.
wait! return. No one is claiming that England have performed poorly at this European Championship. The manager’s choice was a mess. The imbalance in midfield is laughable. England looked like a team trying to play football with unexploded Wehrmacht grenades. The right opponent will tear them apart this way. Just imagine how much pain Spain’s wingers could inflict on these flanks. Maybe England were just setting themselves up for an eventual defeat, Brazil’s clash with Germany in Belo Horizonte, Watford’s horror performance in the cup final.
But the broader fact remains that Southgate’s England have reached the quarter-finals twice, a semi-final and a final. In six years, his England teams have won seven Championship knockout matches. Before Southgate, England had won six knockout games with half a century. It was the most sustained period of success in the history of the English men’s football team.
Taking off Gareth’s goggles for a moment, he’ll need another final to really know for sure. Alf Ramsey actually won one of those games, albeit by a smooth sail (Soviet linesman versus a poor penalty, you take your pick). However, Ramsey also failed to qualify for the 1974 World Cup again and struggled in the first knockout stage. Mexico. Whatever happens now, Southgate can walk away as the only England manager to never publicly screw up at a World Cup while building on unprecedented depth in a fourth-in-a-row victory.
Yes, it feels strange to refer to Southgate as “the GOAT”. Part of the reason is that something only really looks good when it disappears in front of you. But also because there is a good example that Southgate is not even a very good coach, he fails at the tactical side of the game and he will break down in elite club football.
This is probably true. But it reflects two key things. Firstly, how difficult it has been to hire and retain England managers over the years. Imagine if Terry Venables had had four and Glenn Hoddle and Graham Taylor had each had his win. Imagine if the FA had hired top-flight Brian Clough, Bob Paisley, or (oh yes) the toxic supernova-era Jose Mourinho.
Secondly, it tells you what a strange job it is to be an England manager and how important culture and leadership are. Southgate is very good at this. He handled that weird submerged iceberg so well outside of game day that we forgot it even existed. That, combined with a slew of quality players, was enough to go further than anyone outside of 1966.
Of course, it is necessary to refute the opposing arguments. People will say that Southgate has the greatest player, England’s talent is the envy of the world, he has actually been blocking these golden lions. Brazil stare in awe at Connor Gallagher. France are desperate for their own Jordan Henderson. The Netherlands just wish they had a Jesse Lingard.
This might make sense if you don’t know other countries, or have bought into the Premier League’s entire marketing scheme. The reality is that England have always had good players. Southgate created an environment in which they could thrive and did so while leading Ashley Young, Eric Dier and Harry Maguire to work together. This is what good management looks like.
So we will hear that Southgate has been lucky for eight years. Indeed, England are lucky to remain in this tournament. Watching their games was openly painful, and spectator sport was reimagined as a punishing beating.
But maybe, just maybe, Southgate is getting some luck from eight years of solid work. When England might be collapsing, they’re still trying. Something made this happen. Luck ran out. But it didn’t appear out of nowhere.
As for lucky draws, it’s almost not worth pointing out that no one plays all the big teams back-to-back. There is always filler. You defeat them and get the hard stuff. This is a good habit.
It’s at this point that Southgate’s paradox really comes into play. But logically Southgate’s record cannot be viewed as a complete failure, a scam or a source of ongoing frustration – at least not for anyone with semi-functional reasoning abilities. in this way.
Yet this is exactly what is happening. Currently, Southgate is arguably the most outraged person in the country and the subject of constant ridicule. A middle-aged man can say something unfunny on a BBC panel show on a Friday night and then insert “Gareth Southgate” at the end and the fake audience will laugh. The animosity faced by Southgate during his time as England manager was so profound that Southgate became the best manager of the past 50 years – only as a subplot. Yes, England. Just be you.
Where does this anger come from? Unbridled belief that England under Southgate is an ongoing national disgrace? Most obviously, people are tired of the same faces and voices. There is an instinctive complaint. Life is fragile and difficult. People need a place to vent their anger.
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Plus, it’s actually become a race to the bottom in media. Attacking Southgate is all about clicking. The media is no longer Nigel Cake Bread of the Daily Weekly delivered straight to you every Thursday. The news cycle reports from every angle, with a viral battle among pundits to produce a completely editable, apparently spontaneous condemnation.
International celebrity and former England star Gary Sprockington called you a “div” on the world’s third-ranked podcast, Football Viewpoint Laughter. The entire midfield of Blackburn Rovers in 1995-96 was calling for Southgate to be thrown a stone fruit. Lionel2475Luvmykids called Harry Kane a “nonz” 300 times in the last 24 hours.
These are what Southgate calls unusual circumstances. The media was who he had played with. Relatable A-listers can speak directly to their followers on the air like gods, and they’ll amplify these tailored opinions into “just telling it like it is” (while expertly monetizing their podcasts).
There’s something very unique, very modern, very English about how this floating rage is expressed. The cry is always for the untying of bonds and the release of bonds. People always talk about betrayal, about a sword sleeping in stone. We are conditioned by elites, by cold power, by men in suits. Free us. Let us restore the natural order. That is British success, British justice.
Southgate fits this dynamic because he is cautious and controlling. He was perfect for the role because of his look, the awkward schoolmaster style. Politics doesn’t help. For some, he will always be the doorway to awakening, even if he isn’t actually quite sober anymore. Southgate speaks with words. He didn’t growl. He doesn’t surge or release. He read the meter and took out the recycling.
In many ways, he was stuck, unable to do anything but stay the course. These limitations are to some extent his own. Calls to release, attack, release Gareth’s dog have coincided with a degree of chaos at this tournament. Unbalanced choices arise. The manager has forgotten that he is not good at releasing pressure and he has given up on the stability of teamwork.
Southgate is also troubled by the dilemma that English football has thrown at him, not only lacking left-backs and midfielders, but also his own experience. Ultimately, international sports is a test of institutions and culture. Top tacticians may reconsider England’s weaker midfield in 2018 to counter Luka Modric and Ivan Rakitic.
But there are no top-notch British managers. There has never been a successful English tutoring school. The last English coach to win the English League was Howard Wilkinson of Direct Football. That’s why England have Southgate. That’s why England have players who thrive in specific roles, why the pegs are square rather than round. Shout out to the only manager in the past 50 years for finding a way to fudge this; well, that’s definitely one way to try and fix it.
Where will the current iteration be before Dusseldorf on Saturday? The Swiss team is a technically sound and well-organized team. England also have good players. If the mood and form are good, they have the ability to reach the semi-finals for the third time in six years.
There has been talk of a switch to a back three, which would make sense if only to rebalance the core of the team and sneak another defensive-minded player into the controlling area to provide a solid base for the creative players to play off of.
A lot will depend on how England start and how the team feels about themselves after four difficult games. As always, noise will be a factor. Another paradox: the toxic energy surrounding Southgate is further evidence of how well he does his job. This is what you have to fight, what you have to live with.
Imagine trying to get this done while all this is happening. Imagine being able to do this as well as anyone, while constantly being told that you are a liar and a stuffed shirt and that you are actually the problem. A head coach who came in to talk about taking the pressure off his players has been talking about little else over the past week. Southgate is far from perfect. But he deserves the rose just to end it all.