Follow our Olympic coverage in the lead-up to Paris.
The glow of Caeleb Dressel’s seven gold medals might suggest otherwise, but he knows swimming can be a brutal and stifling sport.
He is without a doubt one of the best in the world at his job, dashing from one end of the pool to the other (and sometimes back). He holds the world record in the men’s 100m butterfly, a historic honor he first captured from Michael Phelps in 2019. A world record in events, he won 5 gold medals in 5 events.
Still, Dressel was in pain.
He focused on where he believed he was failing. In a game, it’s your turn. Another one, done. The position of his head. Although he hit the wall first time and time again, it didn’t matter. It didn’t matter that he took home the gold and helped the U.S. top the medal standings. He strives for perfection. He chases time and chases stretch goals. He has not seen them.
“I created a monster in myself – being too obsessed with perfectionism,” he told former Olympians Missy Franklin and Katie Hough on their “Unfiltered Water” podcast. “So getting caught up in this thought, ‘If I don’t see these times, that means I’m a bad person, or it means I’m not training hard enough. If I don’t break the world record, that means… I’m not good enough. obsessed.
The sport he was drawn to as a kid because it was so much fun was the exact opposite. It’s been that way for years. But Dressel kept pushing himself and listening to his inner critic.
Until he “cracked,” as he now puts it. He suddenly quit midway through the 2022 World Championships in Budapest and disappeared from the sport for eight months.
Dressel did not go into detail about that period of his life in Gainesville, Florida, except to say that he spent a lot of time with a therapist. His wife, Meghan, was by his side, though she also recognized that Drexel needed to have many conversations within himself. Some days, he doesn’t do much. Most of the time, he avoids the route that takes him past the University of Florida pool. He didn’t want to smell chlorine.
He has to figure out, after his best days, who he is and what makes him tick outside of the pool. He has to reorient himself, how he believes others feel about him and why they love him. He had to learn how to smile again.
The process isn’t easy, and progress isn’t always linear. But that’s exactly what makes Dressel, 27, a swimmer and a person (and a new dad) today. That’s why he’s back in the pool and heading to Paris, where he’s one of the top names on Team USA and arguably the most important piece in USA Swimming’s efforts to win meets, winning more gold medals than any other national team. Yes, there are external pressures. But deep down, Dressel’s biggest critic was quieter.
“It’s been really tough,” Dressel told Competitor last month. “It’s ingrained in me – you always want to look for ways to get better. I’m still doing that, but I haven’t become so obsessed and focused that I lose sight of the real joy of the sport. It’s very It’s hard, and it’s not something I figured out out of the blue this year. There are things I’m really proud of because I did things differently, like being able to enjoy certain parts of the sport and not beat myself up about not being perfect.
“This is still very much a work in progress.”
Kaleb Dressel won five gold medals at the Tokyo Olympics. But after a year, he retired from the sport. He said of his return that it was still “a work in progress.” (Tim Clayton/Corbis via Getty Images)
Now, Dressel sounds like a man who has learned a lot about himself through therapy. One of the first things he’ll tell you is how helpful his regular appointments with his therapist are.
“I’ve been trying not to be so obsessed with the results and just enjoy competing and training — two parts of the sport that I really enjoy,” Dressel said. “There are parts of the sport that I really don’t like, that I really hate. But for the moments that I actually enjoy, it’s worth enduring. It’s going to be a balance; I don’t expect everyone in the sport to Part of it is the best for me, but I really love the parts of the sport that I enjoy.
“That’s the main difference for me. I’ve always loved training. I’ve always loved being with the team. The actual racing part, I really, really love – as soon as the gun goes off, it’s so much fun. So , I’ve been trying to make it just a swim this year.
Dressel will only compete in the 50-meter freestyle and 100-meter freestyle individual events at the Olympics, and he is likely to participate in multiple relay events. At the U.S. Olympic Trials in Indianapolis, he finished third in the 100-meter freestyle final, denying him a chance to defend his gold medal in Paris.
But he’s happy to be a part of the Olympic team. He is proud of what he achieved in the trials. He was delighted that his young son August could watch it all in Meghan’s arms in the stands.
“No one can take that away from me,” Dressel said in Indianapolis. “He’s not going to remember it. I’m going to tell him, and trust me, I have the pictures, so I can prove it. … It was such a special moment. Meghan knows the implications of that, not just raising children aspect, and she also witnessed firsthand the difficulties that come with the sport.
“The tears, the frustration, the highs that come with it, and sharing that with them because they’ve been through it too — that’s really special, and August gets to see that.”
This month, Meghan shared a video of Dressel and baby August at an Olympic training camp in North Carolina, another moment captured and preserved to commemorate a once-in-a-lifetime moment. They will also travel to Paris with Dressel’s parents and family. Dressel said he wouldn’t be where he is today without their support. He certainly wouldn’t be where he is without Meghan, whom he calls their family’s “superhero.”
Parenting is wonderful for many reasons, but perhaps the most important lesson it taught me was one of perspective—especially for someone who has spent most of his life chasing time and pursuing something that doesn’t and can’t exist Perfect for people.
“I don’t know if I’ll ever experience my best years again, and that’s hard to say out loud. It really is,” Dressel said. “When you’re 19, 20, 21, you keep pushing, pushing, pushing. I’m still working harder than ever, looking for every way I can to shave off those tenths. But I don’t You know. I don’t know if I can do that. You put me in a race and I’ll get as close as I can to get there. situation.
Therefore, he didn’t know what would happen to Paris. But he knows he is older, wiser and happier than he was before the last Olympics. Others see it, too, and not just when he steps across the lane line or hits the water to celebrate after a race.
“He always had that smile,” said Katie Ledecky, a seven-time gold medalist and University of Florida training partner. “He took that time away, and when he came back, he had that smile every day. Just looking at how he’s improved over the past year, how he’s getting better and better every game — He just seems to love the game, and he loves training probably more than the game, which makes everyone around him better.
It will also make one of the best swimmers in the world better. That’s why no matter what medals Drexel wears around his neck, his smile is as precious as gold.
“I don’t know if I’ll ever experience my best years again, and that’s hard to say out loud,” Caleb Dressel said. He will try it out in Paris starting later this month. (Maddie Meyer/Getty Images)
(Above: Dan Goldfarb / Competitor; Photo: Sarah Steele/Getty Images)
